


Afterwards

by madness_and_smiles



Series: Bed Drabbles [1]
Category: Avengers (Comic)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-14
Updated: 2012-05-14
Packaged: 2017-11-05 09:38:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/404954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madness_and_smiles/pseuds/madness_and_smiles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony and Steve discuss their relationship right after the Civil War</p>
            </blockquote>





	Afterwards

It’s the first time that they’ve been together since Steve came back, since The Civil War. Tony is lying in the darkness with the sticky sheets draped loosely around his waist, not yet daring to face the other man. He wants to be running his hands up Steve’s chest and nuzzling his collarbone (Y _ou’re back. It’s real.),_ but that’s not what this is, not yet.  So the two of them lie in the silence and Tony fills it with all the things he wants to tell Steve. He thinks about the constant tear of guilt ( _you were dead),_ about nights alone with nothing but the metal under his skin ( _I cried on top of your still chest),_ about how he had been living a nightmare since the second those shots rang out ( _I kissed your lips, they were cold)_.He’s pulled from these thoughts by the low tenor of Steve’s voice.

“It’s okay if you were seeing someone else,” he says, which causes Tony to flip over and stare critically at the outline of his body, because wouldn’t it be just like Steve to say that, to think that. And Tony could dodge this conversation like a missile if he wanted to, but he’s been on the defensive too long, and before he can stop it the words come out.

“You were dead.” Which is really answer enough and he feels Steve stiffen beside him in response. Tony had remained faithful throughout the entirety of the Civil War ( _there would be an end, had to be an end)_ but afterwards he needed to grieve.  The nameless, faceless rendezvous didn’t help ( _because they weren’t Steve, could never be Steve, and wasn’t that so unfair)_ , but Tony knows that’s not the right thing to say. So he says, “You were dead, and I couldn’t drink. I couldn’t wake up. I couldn’t do anything.”

He feels Steve shift in the bed, sees him lift his head in anticipation of leaving, but before he can sit up Tony rolls on top of him. They’re eye to eye, chest to chest, and he can feel Steve shiver at the coolness of the arc-reactor. There’s a moment of tense stillness; they both know that if Steve wanted to leave, Tony wouldn’t be enough to stop him, but then Steve accepts the weight and runs his hands up Tony’s arms.

“Look I- I’m not going to lie. After you died… and you were dead Steve, you were _dead,_ I may’ve… sometimes… but nobody has slept here in this bed, our bed, but me… and I need you to know that.” Tony’s eyes remain on Steve’s; searching for their old sense of communication, the understanding between the two of them that came so naturally.

He feels it before he hears it, the breath leaving Steve’s body in a heavy sigh.

“Okay _.”_

Tony wants to ask what that means, wants to know how far this acceptance ( _forgiveness?)_ goes, but then Steve’s arms lock around his back and he inhales the scent of Tony’s hair ( _sweat, musk, and product_ ; _not a pleasant smell, but a familiar one)_ and it’s all Tony can do to drag his bristly face against Stave’s into a kiss. Okay is enough for tonight, he decides.


End file.
